A couple of key points help maintain the best possible mindset for giving corrective feedback..
—–Commit to learning vs. blaming.
—–Blaming looks backward and judges.
—–Learning looks forward to understanding.
—–What I think about your intentions IMPACTS how our conversation goes.
—–I have a right to describe impact but am in NO position to judge intention.
—–My commitment to your well-being WILL BE COMMUNICATED and it WILL MAKE THE DIFFERENCE.
Above all, the manner in which feedback is delivered (from a positive mindset) will determine how the feedback is received.
The Mindset of both the giver and receiver of feedback is crucial to its success!
Most of us have a tendency NOT to directly address a problem we’re having with another person. We typically talk to others about how “so- in- so“ is making life difficult or not providing us with something we need. We often love to ventilate and make ourselves feel that we are right and the other person is wrong. Usually this ventilation does nothing at all in terms of improving the situation or relationship with the person at the center of the problem. Here’s where having a mentor can be valuable.
As a mentee you can find discussing such interpersonal conflicts with a mentor can be rewarding. If you decide to do this, you should make sure that your mentor knows that you don’t just want to vent, but that you want your mentor to help you THINK through the issue. Then you’re better prepared to have a difficult conversation with another party. You want your mentor use all his or her mentoring skills, such as level two listing and asking powerful discovery questions. These help you think through the issue so you can come away with a commitment to actually HAVE the difficult conversation, ONE-ON-ONE.