FLASHING LIGHTS

 

ambulance

If you drive much at all, you’ve had the experience of hearing a siren wailing, seeing flashing lights, knowing you MUST pull over very soon to get out of the way of the police, fire or rescue vehicle.

Working in a mentoring relationship can be like that too.

You’ve been speeding along, making great progress and then, over time, you loose energy. You feel pulled over by the side of the road. You know you’re getting warning lights, but you have a bit of confusion.  Your mentoring relationship may need life support and somehow you think YOU may be the problem.

One of the biggest obstacles to a successful mentoring relationship IS internal.  Constant self-criticism can drain the blood right out of any potent relationship.  “I can’t.”  It’ll never work.”  “It’s too challenging.”  “I’m not ready.”  “They won’t like it if I do that.”  “I never do that very well.”  “This could make me different than others.” 

These are all wounding words, and they can cut to the core and halt progress.  The best remedy is to drive straight forward and ask these questions to confront your inner loudmouth critic:  “Am I really helpless?”  “Do  I actually NEED to escape this next challenge?” “Why?”  “Is that really true?”  “Do I remember my energy level when I began this?” “What motivated me then?” “Am I ambivalent now?  Why?”  What could I gain if I drive straight forward?” “What would I get that I don’t have now?”

Having some self-doubt is all too human.  But if your roadblock is steady self-defeating chatter within, it’s time for first aid–give yourself aid, first.  This applies to mentors AND mentees.  Human development is a journey loaded with challenges and obstacles–but the rewards can be SO satisfying–for those who mentor intentionally and for those who apply themselves as mentees.

Advertisements

Tags: , , , , ,

About Mentoring Moments

Perrrone-Ambrose Associates specializes in assisting organizations of all sizes and missions to provide mentoring to their employees at every level. We accomplish this by creating mentoring systems and training strategies and programs for mentors and their mentees in establishing helping relationships. We started this blog with objective of sharing what we continue to discover about the mentoring process and by providing a clearinghouse for sharing our readers' experiences in the world of mentoring.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: